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The MountainGnome
All rights reserved.
ISSN: 1529-6520

 MOUNTAIN NOTES      11.Apr.2000

The Mountaingnome Folks, sometimes our email server develops Gremlins! If you don't receive your weekly issue by Sunday, you can check the Latest Issue Link at any of The MountainGnome pages, or you can e-mail

It's been another busy week here at The MountainGnome! Yes, of course, as usual, I'm behind again! Folks, we're getting alot of responses from other possible contest sponsors, and everyone loves that!

New Contest Sponsor
Welcome Dotty:  Folks, lets welcome our newest sponsor...Mugg Shots by Dotty! What a great gift for any occasion....a picture of yer Mug on a Mugg! Check out Dottys' Shop, where you can have yer favorite photo put on just about anything! This week, Dotty is sponsoring a personalized Mouse Pad for the lucky winner!! So go to the Contest page and enter!

Special: The Mountaingnome Yep, here she is folks. This is the Pretty and Excited gal, from New South Wales, Australia, that was one of our Contest winners last week, Sonya Beneke! She came up with the term "Gnome Sweet Gnome", and we adopted it. We thought it only proper to put Sonya in lime light. From here on in, if you are a contest winner and would like your picture published, just email us a .jpg image, that's all there is to it.

Netscape 6.0!!...Oh Behave Baby...
Well, yes it is just about as wacky as something out of "Austin Powers"! Folks, if ya downloaded the new Netscape 6.0....well I guess you're already disappointed...upset...bewilderd...etc. It's an archaic spin off of the undeveloped MoZilla browser. As far as it being smaller and more potent.....well, we downloaded over 15MB and the looks, speed and navigation is like something out of 1984! If this is what there gonna compete against MS Internet Explorer.....OYVAY! Netscape 4.7 is buggy but it's a heck of a lot better....we use it...gonna stick with it!
Free Domain Name!
The folks at will give ya a free domain name of your choice! But, yep I know, always lotsa buts! You may not git what yer lookin' fer. We still haven't been able to get an answer as to why we can't set up our own web site. You'll get theirs and full of advertising. Folks, seriously now, if ya want a site with yer own domain name, there are plenty of places to register as low as $15.00 per year. Also there are many places that will host your domain site for free! If ya have any questions about them, email
  • Anyone who can walk to the welfare office can walk to work.
    --Al Capp
The MountainGnome is now listed in:
The Folks at The Free Directory of Ezines
The family friendly EzinesPlus.
The Folks at
The Folks at DIY Search

 Greetings from Bob Jones

Davis Station Antarctica:
Sorry folks, nothing to report from Davis Station this week. Those folks stay pretty busy, so they can't always get a weekly to us.
Information relating to Davis Station is at:
All content and photos are property and Copyright of the Australian Antarctic Division.

To Bob and all the folks at Davis....from The MountainGnome and our readers...we wish you all well and have a great week guys!.

  • "The most effective way to remember your spouse's birthday is to forget it once.. "
Talk About Dumb..
An 18-year-old man was charged with robbing a 7-11. When he walked in, pulled a gun and demanded money, the employee didn't panic. She calmly said, "I don't think you're old enough to be robbing us. Don't you have to be at least 16?" The thief then proceeded to pull out his wallet and showed the clerk his driver's license. The clerk quickly memorized the information in the license, than gave the thief the money. The cops picked the robber up at home.(Ummmmmm....huh)

-- The Mountain Man        


Free Wallpaper!
For all you outdoor and firearms is one of our own custom wallpapers by Mountaingnomie Stan K.

Ridin' the Rails: Come on, lit's go fer another train ride. Alllllll Aboard!
The Cass Scenic RR-West Virginia
This authentic remnant of what was once a major logging railroad climbs from the old lumber town of Cass to the summit of Bald Knob, second highest peak in the state. The train, powered by specially designed Shay steam locomotives once used to haul logs, takes passengers past breathtaking views of mountain scenery and climbs to an elevation where the countryside has been described as "a bit of Canada gone astray." The Cass Showcase, a slide presentation and miniature diorama showing the early lumbering days of the town, provides an excellent introduction to the Cass experience. Happy Railroadin' Partners.....have fun and enjoy!!! No better way to enjoy wildlife....nature....and just down right relaxin'!

  • It has been discovered that research causes cancer in mice.
Outdoor Adventure: :Ontario Canada
Witch Bay Camp - Lake of the Woods
You are invited to come and enjoy the beautiful scenery and peaceful surroundings at Witch Bay Camp.

The fresh clean waters are plentiful of Walleye, Muskie, Smallmouth Bass, Northern Pike, Crappie, and Jumbo Perch.

Witch Bay Camp is run as a fishing camp for those who want to get away from heavy boat traffic and water skiers while they are fishing and relaxing. Located on the vast Lake of the Woods, with it's 65,000 miles of shoreline. Our bay is seven miles long, varies in width, with many protected coves and islands. It's truly a sportsman's delight. Our guests enjoy real fishing privacy, the nearest camp being more than ten miles away. You do not need a guide---good fishing starts right off the dock.

  • The length of a minute depends on which side of a bathroom door you're standing on.
Snow Adventure: Switzerland
Ski Zermatt!
Dream a Zermatt dream... discover winter and summer skiing, lodging, and vacations in Switzerland's premier mountain resort.

Ski some of the world's premiere vertical terrain! Come to Zermatt and carve your ski signature among Switzerland's highest mountains, including the beautiful Matterhorn.

Hike, climb, or ski the glaciers of Zermatt! Ride the mountain trains, wonder at the Matterhorn, and bathe in the sun amongst the beauty of the High Alps.
- One of Zermatt's top three-star hotels - with terrific management. - Most rooms with bath or shower/WC, TV, radio, phone, safe, balcony. - Indoor pool, sauna, jacuzzi, and Roman steam bath on site for guests. - Bed and Breakfast from sFr.70 per person.

Survival Tip:Complete a Trip Plan and leave it with a friend:
The trip plan explains your destination, the route you are taking, who is in the group and your return time. If you do not return as planned, the friend you left the trip plan with can give the form to the police to initiate a search.
Until next time: Be Safe ~ Be Happy!!


Show Off: Yessiree, show off that Classic Car ya restored....or send us a car tip...or maybe a great car site! E-mail all them goodies to

Site provides articles, news, and product reviews related to four wheel drive vehicles. . .

*Oil & filter changes every 3,000 to 4,000 miles* (I know this one by heart, but I'm still always 500+ miles late.)


Gison Research Corporation
Trouble In Paradise(TIP)
Zip & Jaz Drive Click Of Death

The FREE way to find out whether you have -- or might soon contract -- Iomega Click Of Death!
What IS the "Click Of Death"?
Click Of Death, Click Death, and COD are names describing the first symptom of a set of serious data threatening problems being encountered with increasing frequency among users of Iomega's Zip and Jaz removable media mass storage systems.

  • Words to live by: Do not argue with a spouse who is packing your parachute.


Article submitted by: Monica K. of Bon Carbo, Co.
There was an atheist couple who had a child. The couple never told their daughter anything about the Lord. One night when the little girl was 5 years old the parents fought with each other and the dad shot the mother, right in front of the child. Then, the dad shot himself. The little girl watched it all. She then was sent to a foster home. The foster mother was a Christian and took the child to church. On the first day of Sunday school, the foster mother told the teacher that the girl had never heard of Jesus, and, to have patience with her. The teacher held up a picture of Jesus, and said, "Does anyone know who this is?" The little girl said "I do, that's the man who was holding me the night my parents died."

Virus Alerts: 911 VIRUS!!
The FBI has isolated a nasty "Windows Shares Virus." For information on detection and removal of this new threat: CLICK HERE!

Submit your articles to

  • A little boy and his truck driving dad were in line at the grocery store behind a very large woman. The woman's pager went off, the little boy said : "WATCH OUT DAD SHE'S BACKING UP !"

 TIPS FOR: Moms-To-Be & New Moms

Pat's Baby Talk:
Site provides helpful tips and links to parenting resources. . .

Great Baby Shower Games:
Everyone knows that baby showers are really all about the gifts, but it wouldn't look too good if guests just walked in the door, watched the mom-to-be open her presents, ate a little cake, and left.(Howww Ruuude!)

Baby Bingo is a great game. Each guest receives a page with 16 or 20 squares on it. Before the mother-to-be opens her gifts, each guest writes down on their sheet which presents they think she'll get (each square must have a different item). Then, as each gift is opened, if you have it in one of your squares, put an "X" through it. When you have a row of X's, you win a prize. The prizes are just small gifts, wrapped and placed in a big basket that the mother-to-be gets to keep. Each guest ends up getting a little something, and it keeps the interest level high and the attention on the mother-to-be. It's lots of fun!"
NOTE: Always follow the advice of your Physician!

Common Car Seat Mistakes:
Folks, NEVER get in a hurry when it comes to installing a car seat and fastening your baby into a seat. Please, ALWAYS fasten them correctly! There are no shortcuts when it comes to preserving a life!

According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA), the most common mistakes people make with car seats include threading seatbelts through the wrong slots, not using a locking clip when one is required, failing to buckle in the child, and installing the seat too loosely. A correctly installed seat will not be able to move more than an inch forward or to either side. The NHTSA reports that as many as 50 percent of all car seats are installed or used incorrectly. But educating parents about a car seat's compatibility with their vehicle can overcome the vast majority of these problems.

  • They say you can't take it with you... But they also can't come and get it!


Linux Note: When downloading a linux .tar/ .gz or .rpm file, It is sometimes necessary to hold down the shift key while clicking on the file you want to download.

EzyMassMailer - Updated to V1.95

Software Feature:
Turbo-Surfer 2000:
The inventor of TURBO SURFER-2000 claimed that it would improve the internet performance of any desktop computer up to 220% instantly. Software Feature:
Welshware UnLtd Proudly presents: TheNet V3.66 - Freeware.
The World's Number ONE "Award Winning" - "Live" CAMera and Internet-MultiMedia Package
Software Feature:
eSafe Desktop, is now available on Aladdin's website to all home users free of charge, including all virus/vandal signature updates.
Software Feature:
Hunting Season
It's hunting season for elk. This is a shooting game with some whacky effects. If you aren't fast enough, the elks will cut down your deer stand!
  • True story:
    A wife was having "one of those days" where nothing seemed to go right. She kept dropping everything she grabbed. In exasperation, she finally exclaimed, "Son of a bxxxch!" Our son opened his door, stuck out his head and grinned, "You called for me, mom?" Her aim and grip after she picked up the dropped object was much improved.
Great Buy: Freeplay Self-Powered Lantern :
Put the power of light in your hands without the the need to replace batteries all the time. Simply wind the handle for thirty seconds for up to two hours of light on normal operation.
ITEM: XK-51-4122
PRICE: $69.99


"Index To Volunteer Soldiers, 1784-1811," Virgil D. White (Waynesboro, 1987)
"Index To Old Wars Pension Files, 1815-1926," Virgil D. White (Waynesboro, 1993)
"American Militia In The Frontier Wars, 1790-1796," Murtie June Clark (Baltimore, 1990). Includes records of Georgia, Kentucky, New Jersey, Ohio Territory, Pennsylvania, Southwest Territory (Tennessee), and Virginia

These records should be available in major genealogical libraries, and they can be searched through the Tennessee State Historical Society.

  • "Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves!"


Does the sun shine bright on your old Kentucky home? If not, you've probably never heard of a Hot Brown sandwich. And even if it does, you may never have made a Hot Brown, because the sauce is a little tricky. This easy version provides wonderful, rich flavor with less effort, so you can enjoy the taste of home. (And all you non-Kentuckians can get yourself a little Southern culture and try something new!) Serves 4.

  • 2 tbsp butter
  • 4 tbsp flour
  • 2 c milk
  • 1/2 tsp chicken bouillon
  • 1/2 c shredded sharp cheddar cheese
  • 4 slices bread, toasted
  • 6 oz cooked turkey breast meat, thinly sliced
  • 6 oz cooked ham, thinly sliced
  • 1 tomato, sliced
  • 4 slices bacon, cooked until crisp
  • 2 tsp Parmesan cheese
  • Paprika
Preheat oven to 300 degrees. Melt butter in skillet. Stir in flour. Gradually add milk and bouillon; cook until thickened. Add cheese. Stir until cheese is melted; remove from heat.

Put toast in flat baking dish. Put turkey and ham on toast. Spoon cheese sauce over meat. Bake 10 minutes.

Top with bacon and tomato slices; bake 5 minutes more. Sprinkle with Parmesan and paprika before serving.

So until next time, REMEMBER:  "Do not marry a person that you know you can live with; only marry someone that you cannot live without."